I have a confession to make; it wasn’t until AFTER I became a Beachbody coach that I really looked into Shakeology.
For the longest time, I thought this was just another consumable product for Beachbody to sell like all the other protein powders, meal replacements, fat blockers and “supplements”. I thought it was an easy way for Beachbody to make money.
As all of my close friends know (and are incredibly annoyed about), I am a bit of a food nazi. I am the perfect Whole Foods target market: young, hipster mom wanting to feed her family organic, whole foods with less than 5 ingredients, which are locally sourced from a family-run farm located just up the road, containing no GMO’s and that are grown and cultivated by fairy princesses that are paid fair wages in pixie dust using the best Fair Trade practices. I know I’m annoying. I don’t really give a shit.
So when I was told about Shakeology, I was like hella skeptical. I even bought some to placate my coach and let it sit in my pantry for months. Like, I was determined to not like it.
When I became a coach, I figured I would just sell the fitness products. I mean, I knew I liked those. I have been doing them on and off for a decade and loved their variety and intensity. Plus, I hate the gym (but that story’s for another day). After much nose-turning and snobbish side ways glances at my pantry, I decided to look into it. I knew I needed a reason to not like it just in case anyone asked.
I started by looking at the box. It had like a BAZILLION ingredients. All fellow food snobs know this is a bad sign. You aim for 10 ingredients, tops. This had seventy. 70. Seven, zero. Even normal shitty protein powders don’t have that many! I knew I was going to hate it. But I was secretly thrilled because it validated everything my foodier-than-thou attitude had become.
I sat down on my laptop and did the only sane thing a person in my situation could do. I Googled it.
“Why Shakeology is bad for you”
“Chemicals in Shakeology”
“Shakeology ingredients” + “bad”
You can see where my head was at. I wanted to find the smoking gun on Shakeology. But I was not prepared for what happened next.
The articles were super weak. Even looking for the shitty stuff, the worst thing a person could say about it was, “It might not do anything for you, but it won’t hurt.” There was one guy who didn’t like the Ginko Baloba. That was truly all I could find. And I LOOKED. I scanned DOZENS of articles and videos and journals and found nothing. Major let down.
So then I took a different approach.
“What’s in Shakeology”
“Medical effects of Shakeology”
These articles told me something. One, they laid out each ingredient and sourced the benefit of each one. I honestly double checked a bunch of them to make sure they were on the up and up. Two, they told me that Shakeology was created by superfood hunter, Darin Olien. A guy who traveled the globe looking for hidden, overlooked superfoods, sources in countries that promoted Fair Trade practices and focused on the whole food benefit of each ingredient (no word on Fairy Princesses).
This guy had me. This is someone I trusted and followed and was even married to one of my favorite actresses (Eliza Coupe- Happy Endings- Netflix binge it right. Fucking. Now.) I TRUSTED this guy and I trust no one.
I had done the research and figured my dick attitude was going to be justified and validated. What a let down.
I had run out of excuses. Maybe I would get lucky and hate the stuff.
So, one morning, I loaded my blender with all my favorite frozen fruits and a package of Vanilla Shakeology. It looked kind of chalky and had a surprising amount in each sample bag. Things were looking up. I was about to retch this stupid shake and be done once and for all.
It was freakin’ glorious.
It had a light flavor and smooth consistency and already made my smoothie better than it had been in months.
I was running out of excuses. I had been so dead-set on hating this stuff that I had not been emotionally prepared for liking it. Ugggggggggggggh. I hate when I’m wrong.
So, I quietly started using it. I didn’t want everyone to think I had drunk the Beachbody Kool-Aid and become one of those people. I started drinking it every day and slowly measured how it made me feel and effected my body.
After a day, it cleaned me out and made me feel lighter and more regular (sorry, TMI. I should have warned you) After a week, my skin was fucking glowing. Like, I had never had skin like that. And honestly, I liked MAKING it. I liked the laziness of it. I grabbed a pack of Shakeology and either just added water and shook (chocolate) or added a couple fruits and veggies and blended (Vanilla). I am a huge fan of not doing much in the mornings and I was able to make it on the way out the door and drink it while I walked my daughter to school. Couldn’t be much lazier than that.
I had been beat. I had drunk the Beachbody Kool-Aid and liked it. Fuck. Now I was on the hook for an expensive added expense every month. Grrrr.
But when I actually broke it down, with my coach discount (25%- and there are a ton of people who become discount coaches just to get Shakeology cheaper) it was less than the Starbucks-a-day habit I had racked up. It was about $4/day.
I TRIED. I really, really tried, you guys. I tried to hate it. I had every excuse in the book and tried to come up with a tangible reason to hate Shakeology. And I failed. Miserably. Hopelessly. Embarrassingly.
There was only one thing left that I could hate about Shakeology. And it was the term “meal replacement”.
After all that work. All that research to investigate what was actually in this mystical fairy princess powder and they use the term “meal replacement”
I’m sure there is some FDA, governmental rule about classifying this product but to me this is not a meal replacement.
This is a meal. You don’t call your spinach, almond milk, strawberry smoothie a meal replacement. It’s a fucking smoothie and it is healthy and delicious. It’s not a scam product loaded with chemicals and foreign ingredients made by people to get rich off you. It’s just food. In fact, this is a superfood. As much as I tried to vilify this stuff, it’s a goddamn relief in my life.
I know I am getting all my nutrients every day, even if the rest of my day is loaded with crap food (which it isn’t, because I also bought into the 21 Day Fix– what can I say?). It has so positively affected my life that I could not imagine being without it. Even my hard-to-please husband is starting to use it. And my daughter always steals my leftovers! As much as I tried, I am no longer ashamed to say:
My name is Laura and I love Shakeology.
I suppose that’s what you get for going up against magical fairy princess powder.